Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Sal's Corner

It's spring again. And you gotz to beware. The street walkers are out here. From 12:00 PM to 2:30 PM daily, downtown niggas are on the prowl. Toothpicks in their mouth and shoes shined. From the court buildings to the Government buildings, they are out. There is nothing a lil sunshine and windy air can't do to make the lunchhour seem a lil longer than it should. Those of us cheating tryna leave the desk @ 12:50 just to get that full lunch period in. I know you! You cant fool me. And I dont wanna fool you. So Im gonna teach and expose to you some of the people you can watch for in this springtime. I'm not gonna call any names in particular. I'm just gonna give nicknames and you can go for what you know.

"Loops and Hoops" - Oh you know em. He's the baldheaded guy in your building with the earring in his ear. Not the stud but the hoop. Alot of these niggas came on out around '93 when Michael Jordan made it cool to rock the bald head wit da hoop. He can be seen wit da black slacks and the light grey blazer. Not to mention the silver and red tie. If you are seen shopping where he shops, reconsider. He's a nice guy though. You might see em in line at the Hot Bar and he's a good guy to talk to while waiting in a long line.

"Hooks and Flaps" - A real Trench Coat kinda guy. Maybe even a copier machine technician. Chinese collars galore. We call em "Hooks and Flaps" because that trench coat has so many belts and folds in it. He even sports a leather one when he takes his kids to the movies. "Hooks and Flaps" is a good guy though. He causes no problems. He's not tryna outdress you or anything. But he's always out and about, handling his business but, cant escape the laughter of teenage kids that he shares public transportation with

"French Cuff" - He's a playa. Well, that's if you asked HIM. Yall know "French Cuff". Type of nigga to roll up on you at the b-ball court. Only nigga in America that always say "Lemme get a shot" but he STAY dressed up. Never break a sweat though. Steve Harvey is one of these type niggas. "Light Purple shirt with the white cuff" type nigga. "Wild leg slacked" type nigga. "Thick Mustache" type nigga. "Box and 1 fade" type nigga. "French Cuff" thinks that he runs the downtown lunchtime playa scene. He's a GAZELLE with no lenses type nigga too!!! Watch em. He gotta few buddies that he run wit. He's gotta buddy named "Big Pieces" that we will talk about in a second. He spends some of his lunch hour schooling the young dudes on the block. He has a few young girls. But thats only because he treats the female interns to McDonalds every Friday.

"Big Pieces" - We call em "Big Pieces" because it aint a day that goes by that he don't got at least 4 pieces to a suit. He stay wit big pieces. The suspenders, the belt, the vest, the hat.....the whole shaaabaaamm. "Big Pieces" is running buddies with "French Cuff". "Big Pieces" is married though. He straddles the line. He goes to church but still partakes in a "lil drank" every now and then. Might take one pull of a cigarette. He might flirt wit his lady friends but always comes home to "Mama". One thing about "Big Pieces".....he can throw a party. If you aint been, you have heard about the "French Cuff and Big Pieces" affairs. "Big Pieces" always tries to satisfy EVERYBODY all at once and you cant do that.

"SOUTH CAROLINA" - You can go as north as New York and "South Carolina" exists. That nigga left the south 27 years ago and STILL has a country accent. He has one tooth that is lightly dead in the front. You can see that white turning blueish/purple. This guy is giving you ALL purple in his fashion arsenal. Purple suits, Black dress shirts and silk ties galore. Toothpicks and gold everywhere. Now dont get it confused, he can be from North or South Carolina. Maybe Georgia but we will call him "South Carolina".

So my friends, I just feel a need to inform you of who's "Dressed and Coded" for the Spring and Summer of 2006.

Lord Willin, Rome Feelin