Monday, August 15, 2005

Sal's Corner
"THE BUCKET PACKET"


Maybe some of you are fortunate enough to never experience driving a "BUCKET". Well.....I wasn't! I know what it is to be in a "BUCKET" and it can hurt sometimes. The summer is coming to an end and with the cooler weather comes more problems for "BUCKET" drivers. Here are some tips on what you need and what you need to do to weather the storms of "THE BUCKET"

* 50 CENT - You always need 50 CENT in the ride. NO not the rapper but 2 Quarters. "BUCKETS" often get flat tires. A new car will just have a tire rip and its no problem.......go get another tire. A "BUCKET" tire will just need air. It wont ever rip. But you'll put about 32 dollars worth of quarters into the Air Machine in a course of a few months

* AVOID DRIVE THRU's - That's unless you are by yourself. Windows on "BUCKETS" are SHAKY. They might roll down NOW but then they might STAY DOWN when you try to roll them up. You gotta "BUCKET" and you have "Company" in your car, just go inside and order the food.

* CHIVALRY - Now some say Chivalry is dead. Some say it never dies.........but if you drive a "BUCKET" and your woman is riding shotgun, she got to know the deal. She might have to get in on your side..........OR you might gotta get in or her side. Just depends on the day and whether or not the key hole is frozen from the temperature. My suggestion: DONT lock the doors. Just put the club on the wheel and take the face off the radio. Put the rest of the stuff in the trunk. So if you are on a first date..........you can keep the doors unlocked when you go inside and when yall come out, you can FAKE like you are putting a key in the door and open it for chivalry purposes.

* HOT WATER/COLD WATER - In the summer, always keep a jug of water for overheating. In the winter always walk out of the house with a Hot cup of water to pour over your door to avoid freezing. Put it like this.....you always need water with a "BUCKET"

* JUMPER CABLES - You betta have these........its not even an option. Your car will cut off on you at the most embarrasing points. People will lie to you........"No I dont have Jumper cables". SO ALWAYS have some. Because I'll tell you.........if you ask someone for Jumper Cables..........they'll STOP. They'll stop and say "I wish I had some, I would help you". So BAIT them in. ASK THEM for cables so they can throw that SLUM line out there and then you can say "OH I have some right here". They're stuck now.

* WHEN YOU STOP, PUT IT IN PARK - "BUCKETS" run low sometimes. They run so low they almost cut off. When you stop, put it in park and rev up the gas. Nevermind the idiot in the Acura TL next to you thinking you wanna race him. "Nigga Im just tryna keep my car on"

"Lord Willin, Rome Feelin"