Monday, April 04, 2005

Sal's Corner
"The Send-Off"

We all live our lives for the day that it's in. Some live in the past. Some prepare for tomorrow. EVEN if you prepare for your afterlife and know that it shall come, we never are quite ready for death. I can't speak for every culture but, in the African-American culture.......YOU may not be ready for your death but, many others are ready for yours. I don't say that in a bad manner. But, when we have death occur close to us, we do various traditional acts and celebrations to send off our fallen brethren. Many of us will never be famous or adored by the masses but, you'd think the Pope died when "Butch", "Ray", "Lil Don Don" or "Cletus" departs this world. The following are some of the things "we" do when our people die.

* Noise: First off.....TRUST and KNOW........we not letting our people die without having something to say, do or yell about. EVERYBODY wanna speak at the house, the church, and AFTER the whole process is done. It's always that ONE lady that feels like she gotta tell 100 stories about the passed on person. Then you got the niggers. Not Niggas........NIGGERS outside shooting in the air when someone dies. Cant EVER forget about them. Or the people who can't sing but claim the song is being sung in God's name so we gotta excuse them. Or the famous people who die and everybody gotta call into the radio station acting like they knew the dude.

* Limo: OH YES.........the only time we ride in style is when we lose a member. But we got to do it! I dont see why we all just cant drive to the place. Or rent a minvan. But.......we GOT to get a limo! It wouldnt be any other way!

* Liquor: OH yes, if you aint poppin nothing for the funeral it aint right. I dont care if the person that died didn't condone drinking. I dont care if the family don't condone it......... "Willie" or "Boo-Boo" is gonna slip in that funeral with a flask. It's gonna be some remy on some stank breaths in that service. And AFTER the funeral.........some of those who claim they dont drink is gonna get a lil "taste". It's always an excuse to "drank" when Mr. Williams was like a daddy to you. And everyone pours out liquor to the ground in memory cause if he were here he'd have his cup too. This drinks for you!

* Food: If you are on a diet, no need in going to ANY part of the funeral process for the week. Even if you say you not going to the repass, it's gonna be plenty of food at the house and at the church and EVERYwhere from the moment he/she dies until about a week after the funeral. People truly "put their foot in it" when it comes to funeral cooking. But sometimes..........they TRULY "PUT THEIR FOOT IN IT". Ive been to some repasses and I'd rather pass on the re. Just take me to McDonalds.

* Memorials: You know niggas..............gotta have the R.I.P. T Shirt ON at the funeral. The picture got the boy smoking weed on it. Now Mamma Diggs dont wanna see her grandbaby in that kinda way.....ESPECIALLY when Pastor Jenkins is sitting right there in the Pugh. Then you got the people who wanna put Teddy Bears on poles outside. Knowing good and well that bear is gonna be rank in about 3 days after all the rain and snow hit it.

Some of us never could live out the dreams we had as kids. So many times we die before our time or we wasted time on earth. Well our families see to it that we arent sent off without a Bang. If no one knows you.......they will after you die