Monday, September 20, 2004

Sal's Corner
"Showing Off"

When I was a child I used to HATE this term. Old folks always felt you were "SHOWING OFF!". It used to get under my SKIN. But I've come to realize that "Showing off" can get you killed. I mean literally! You remember your grandmother used to say "Keep on Showing out now!". YES, "SHOWING OUT!", that was used when you were really out of control. Only experienced grandmothers could use that term. But anyways, today I will attempt to expose ways in which "Showing off" can get you killed.

* First Day of School - It's no coincidence that the most fights occur on the first day and into the first week of school. It's the clothes. Everybody gotta be fresh on that first day. You stay up half the night pacing in the house cause you just KNOW you gonna kill em tomorrow. Look at you "Showing off" ALREADY. You aint even left the house. Some of yall wore your school shoes the last week in August and they're dirty before school starts. But anyway, you get to kinda fresh. Your walk changes. Your talk changes. All of a sudden something happens. Someone tries to get your attention and grabs your shirt too hard. Someone bumps you. Someone steps on your new shoes. In November you would let it go but, since you aint getting another pair until tax season when Big Mamma get that check, you go WILD. Next thing you know, before you even gotta schedule, You knocked out on somebody's cafeteria floor. "SHOWING OFF"!

* Church - School is where the young people "Show off". Church is where the old folks "Show OUT". They always say that our generation is bad but they show their tails too. Aunt Wilma went out and bought them too small shoes and had the nerve to let the Holy Ghost take over in the service. Her feet looked like grey play-do when she took her shoes off. I never seen toe nails wit tinted windows. Her nails are so black. But, she seen them shoes in that store. Didn't have her size but..........she had to have em. Years later, she done caught the GOUT and they gotta remove her foot. There it is.........."SHOWING OFF!".

* High Heels - Women, yall wanna be SO cute. You go out and but the highest heels you can find. Now its fall so yall wanna pull out the PONCHO's and wrap em around your shoulders and go buy the finest handbags and hit up ALL the hottest college homecomings. You walking so fast tryna get a ticket to the game and you messed around and walked overtop of one of them steamholes and got your foot stuck in there. Your heel done broke and now you look like that retarded lady at the bus stop with the short leg. You walking like you doing the "WOP". You look like a background dancer for Kool Moe Dee. So........lemme ask you, HOW YOU LIKE ME NOW? But anyway, it's a football game, high heels aint for this environment. The afterparty is tonight NOT at the game! Dress down a lil bit. JUST a tad!

* Sports - Parents, especially single parent mothers, DONT let your kid play football or basketball just to take up time or to give them "something to do". If your kid is NOT athletic he will get KILLED. He standing out there on the 50 yard line looking over at you tryna "show-off". "LOOK MAMMA, Im playing!!!!!!!!". 10 minutes later........."LOOK MAMMA I DONT HAVE NO TEEF!". Mess around tryna look cute and pull up his socks on the basketball court, and turn around and get dunked on! Take your time with these kids and make sure they are willing to learn the proper way to play the game.

* Motorcycles - Lemme tell yall something..........just because you have a driver's license to operate automobiles does not mean you can drive a motorcycle. Yall out here "Showing off" for these women and getting killed. I had a very good friend died behind a motorcycle so I tell people, if you can't operate one, stay away from it. No but, yall wanna be all down Georgia Ave and Republic Gardens "showing off" for them "fast" girls. You wanna have em on the back of your bike and you think you bad in that leather jacket. That's all they gonna find when the ambulance comes and picks you up.

The moral of the story is, when you think you SO bad, you might mess around and clip up and fall, get hurt or even killed. You dont have to think that you are "All That", just be it. "Lord Willin, Rome Feelin"