Thursday, June 03, 2004

"A Nigga You Never Want to Meet, Part 1"
By Reggie Dinkins, Jr.


In life there are some people that you hear old people warn you about. Some are good folks with a bad reputation, and others just bad and evil niggas with no moral foundation. You would often hear "Don't play with Jamal that boy is bad" but, all the while he just misses his dad. But, there is one dude that old folks knew was bad from the jump, and would bother you no matter what you do. "That Arthur, that ole Arthur."

Ole "Arthur", the type of boy to make your grandmother cuss. "Arthur" goes unnoticed by many youth, they have no idea of the havoc he wrecks on the stairs bending over to get a false tooth. Ole "Arthur", ooh he is a devilish boy, he once tried to trip my grandaddy on the steps, like a stray toy from his grandboy. Ole "Arthur" grabbed his knee, and tried to pull him down. I just heard "that Ole Arthur tried to get me" but, I saw nothing as I looked around. Not a man or a boy, or even that stray toy, didn't even see my uncle named Lee, whose given name is Arthur as a little boy.

As I look around often hearing about this "Arthur", I just think he must be one busy somebody. He's in the kitchen and the bedroom, the bathroom and the basement. I'm checking the ceiling and even the dusty vents, just who is this "Arthur" going around punching and grabbing my grandparents. Who is this coward who plays "Punchbuggy" all through the day. "Arthur" "Arthur" "Arthur", he makes you wanna scour the streets, questioning every new lil guy you meet "Is this Arthur, could this be the dreaded dreaded Arthur? Is this the boy punching my grandma in the back, squeezing her wrist and keeping her off my back? Is this that Arthur who kicked my granddad in the knee, or twisted grandma's ankle like a wicked root of the tree?"

I dont know who this "Arthur" may be, but if he is causing all this trouble, I'm gonna have to check with somebody. "Ma who is Arthur and has he been bothering you? He has been running wild at grandma's like a monkey at the zoo....Arthur's been here, he aint been in my room, wait til I grow up I show him something that goon." Little did I know no matter how old he gets ole "Arthur" never forgets, your birthdays, weddings, or even a walk downstairs. That nasty young nigga should have a sign that says "beware". He may not be a dog, but his bite is worse, just the other day he made Ms. Mattie cry like someone stole her purse. He got her elbow, then her toe. I just wonder is there no limit to how low he will go.

Ole "Arthur", a nigga that you never want to meet. Trust me when I tell you.........he might even wake you out your sleep. Now I aint for no killing, but I think them old folks would understand if "Arthur" was killed by a murderous hand. Be careful on them steps, and at the Pilates class, ole "Arthur" might grab your knee, hip, or the back of your "surface". So if you rolling around in pain like a 45 yr old contortionist at the circus, not to worry, that is just "Arthur" so dont hurry, just sit yourself down and get to know that Tiger Balm. Like that old lady on the Tylenol commerical rubbing she palm, you just met "Arthur", ole "Arthur" indeed.




"The Streak"
By Salvador Gabor


Life is a game of "Streaks". Seems as if when you are winning, you can lose. When you are losing, you can't even get a cheap victory. "Streaks" are waves that we ride when we are on top and they can be lessons we learn from when we are on the bottom.

There have been some long streaks in the history of mankind. Cal Ripken's streak of over 2,000 consecutive games played in baseball is one. How about that old man on your job who wears the same sweater and arrives at work at 5:30 every morning. That's a great streak! Or the streak of shootings that took place over in that project down the street from you. 27 straight nights of bussin off aint no joke. But, whether it's good or bad, a "streak" leaves a lasting impression.

What about the bad "streaks"? Well........what about em? We all know about good "streaks" and if you are on one right now, ride it out as long as you can. But, I want to deal with those who are in a bad "streak". No, not an unemployment "streak". Naw, not a losing "streak" with the opposite sex. Not even a bad "streak" of parking tickets. This is a "streak" that we all are "on top of" but, we can't handle sometimes. This "streak" is definitely a losing "streak" and we need desperately to get out of it.

When we get into this particular "streak", it's because we have not properly gotten rid of that "mess" that lie within us. We let this "mess" linger. We even begin to see this "mess" as being ok to deal with. We let it become apart of our lives and we begin to "gas" ourselves up. We get so "gassed" that we think we can just let this mess blow out of us slowly instead of "dumping" it. "I will change one day!". "I'm not ready to get rid of the mess". Don't let that "mess" fool you. It will surely "gas" you up. Next thing you know, you will have a "streak" on your hands..............or DRAWLS, I should say. Yep, this message is not about life...........I just took you guys around the block a few times to say this...........


IT'S HOT OUTSIDE. WE SWEAT. WE EAT ALL THIS FOOD. AND WE FART. YES WE ALL DO. BUT, CLEAN YOURSELF OUT. ONE FART IS OK BUT, IF YOU FART ALL DAY, IT WILL BE HARD TO TAKE THAT BROWN "STREAK" AWAY.


This message has been brought to you by "The National Association of Men who Handwash their Drawls before their Wives do Laundry". They are also simply known as "United Nasty Niggas, Inc.".