Thursday, March 18, 2004

"March Madness Selective Show"
by Reggie Dinkins, Jr.


It is well into March, and March Madness has begun. For those of you not quite aware of what I mean. March Madness beginning those warm days prior to spring springing. People start acting wild, and the characters come out, and character comes out. Some people seem to think that we characters care if they come out. Let's be selective with our March Madness, but not too selective. Selective traits are oftentimes needed to mentally get thru the day, but sometimes they are unecessary. Pull up a chair, get your fill and enjoy some of this Knowledge Pot-Liquor.

Selective Hearing: Now we all use this. You know when that homeless guy, with the wad of cash, is trying to get your attention. This is primetime for Selective Hearing. Or when that group of big girls thinks she is flirting, but is really harrassing a young brother, Selective Hearing should be used after the 2nd and or 3rd comment. Depending on whether or not they have been drinking, and how many there are, buffalo travel by the herd. However all these self-proclaimed divas, who think that just because they took Palottis since November they think they dont have to oblige a man asking for directions on the street. Not a time for Selective Hearing.

Selective Memory: The people in this bracket are funny. This is another tactic ployed by those self-proclaimed divas. Now self-proclaimed divas, dont always look good, and are often big lonely women who think they are part-time psychologists, relationship experts, poets, and all things refined. They like to see people in public places, and either not speak, or act like yall didnt cheat on Accounting Tests together. All that "oh hey, whats your name...dont I know you" yeah you knew my name real well when you thought I had that stolen test. Now selective memory in these situations is never really good, but there is a difference when a woman selective remembers a man for whatever reason: they used to be involved, he wanted to involve her, she wanted him to be involved, what have you. But when 2 women attempt to use selective memory with one another, it just makes for one big commotion of fake-laughing a bunch of "ok's", "I'll call you" and otherwise unecessary BS. This is usually followed by a profanity-filled statement or two. Just waive and keep it moving.

Selective Learning: This is usually a trait embraced by "suckers for love". Brothers who think if they keep giving her their money she will treat you differently, not a chance. Sisters who think if they take him back this one more time he will stop spending your money on that "white woman". Learn yourself something, if she just wants you for your money put her out in front of an ATM, and they will be happy together; send the brother to rehab or just drop him down Kennedy Street, there is plenty of "white womans" down there.

There is nothing wrong with being selective, but when you start acting selective that brings about falsified traits. Fortify your being with select choices and not selective selectiveness just for the sake selecting some new thing to get someone to select you. Select is somewhere between the direction and right before start, so before you play the game, make sure you got the right number. If you know how to play the game, you dont even need to use select.


"Auto Report"
by Salvador Gabor




Before the Cadillac EXT, there was the El Camino. The first EVER luxury pick-up of its kind. What other car do you know that can suffice the duty of taking out a date AND moving some bulk furniture at the same time?????? The El Camino is a 2-seater that is cozy enough for a couple yet sturdy enough for an old coach with ripped up plastic on it.

El Camino's are not seen alot on the street nowadays. People have become "too fancy" for this pickup-car. Yet with the resurgence of pickups being in fashion, the El Camino is bound to make a comeback. Priced at $1,300, this ride isnt a bad purchase. If you dont mind, scrolling across the radio dial and hearing the profanity from the CB walkie/talkie that comes standard in these vehicles, then this is the car for you. When you go outta town, who needs a hotel. Just lay you a spread out on the back and you got a nice sleep ahead of you.

For more info on El Camino's or cars of its kind, Contact Martin's Cars & Cognac. Located on 2200 Larchmont Ave. in Capitol Heights, MD. The number over there is (301) 782-4698. Ask for Aston or Remy.